Celebrating the AFL grand final in the ultimate man cave. I take a look through its manly interior design.
This year I celebrated the 2014 AFL grand final in the ultimate man cave up somewhere in old Yanchep, 45 minutes north of Perth city. It felt like the middle of nowhere. Upon entering o in awe I was of this man cave creation was I (if you haven’t read my interior design bachelor pad article, read it here), that I just had to take photos and blog about it.
Take a virtual tour through this masterpiece of manliness.
Upon entering, the floor immediately tells you where the man-cave owner’s loyalty resides… a dedicated Carlton supporter. You’re either with him, or against him.
Beer & Bullshit Barn. Sounds promising, but just they forgot to add the Boobs part!
A bloke loves his fishing, so throw in a fish pond outside the ultimate man cave and fill it with Koi fish to get the manly party started.
Don’t forget about the bonfire! Guests at the ultimate man cave will need to burn all the cartons of beer consumed and who doesn’t like to get a little destructive at the end of a footy game.
Don’t forget to hang ‘warning’ and ‘danger’ signs around the man cave to intimidate guests.
What’s a man cave without the alcohol. Put it on display proudly and elegantly so people can be impressed your high endurance levels.
Mate, impress your fellow blokes and birds with your likes, hobbies and interests displayed on the walls. It makes for great conversation starters, plus it adds to the quirky charm of the place.
You’ll need a big screen TV and surround sound system to watch the AFL grand final game and blast music. Don’t be ashamed to invest in a sneaky karaoke system, as it’ll come in handy once everyone is exceptionally drunk. There is always one at a party that thinks they are a gifted singer.
Another great view of the man cave, timber ceiling, arcade games, TV, alcohol…. but don’t forget the….
Giant stuffed gorilla. To really emphasise that you’re in the manliness of man-caves, hang up a stuffed gorilla smoking a cigar, drinking a can of cougar, holding a condom and playing the trumpet while reading. Badass.
What is a man cave without superior entertainment and friendly competition? DAYTONA USA racing. The theme song is still stuck in my head. Get on it. If there are kids around, they’ll be stuck to this for the whole night.
Don’t forget the obligatory pinball machine.
And the retro multi-game arcade table!
Got to have the mandatory dartboard to continue the friendly competition. Disclaimer: please drink and dart responsibly. They are sharp.
Make sure to have at least one man on the cave-man premises sporting a fully grown beard, as a beard is the height of rugged manliness.
A man-cave toilet needs a sign to remind the drunk bloke to aim straight. There should also be a stool next to the toilet in case he needs to sit and contemplate on the meaning of life.
A successful man-cave party isn’t complete without man’s best friend walking about. A dog certainly brings out the affectionate side in people, they’ll be loved and patted throughout the night.
Collect your bottle caps with pride, and put them on display to show once again, how awesome you are at drinking.
Feed the beer bellies at the party with lots of sausage rolls and party pies.
Now that it’s dark – light the bonfire. And if you brought your camping gear – enjoy sleeping next to it, looking up at the stars.
Humour aside, I was really impressed with this amazing man-cave built at my friends’ dads home. I loved how he collected his favourite memories throughout his life and put them on show. It makes for great conversations and a quirky atmosphere.